PresentaPhobia
Yep, I just made up that word (I think). I did have such a big fear of presentation, not because I don't know the material but because I'm such an introvert by nature so being the center of attention, all eyes on me as I utter every word makes me perspire at the mere thought of giving a presentation.Anyhow, I'm proud to say that I'm over it now. Thanks to my new employer who perhaps thought that my strength is giving presentations when it was actually unexplored.
The first was when I had to lead the monthly performance forum and didn't know anything more than my slides. It didn't go as well as I would have hoped it to because I lacked historical data so I couldn't really compare, I could just be factual about the Now results.I was then asked to lead a teambuilding event for the Finance department. Of course, I didn't get any sleep due to high levels of anxiety and stressing about it going all wrong since I've never done something like this before. I'd keep changing the slides to the very last 5 mins before the beginning of the event. I even changed slides during the breaks.
My first day, I suffered from terrible anxiety but funny enough my nervousness was displayed as enthusiasm and excitement. I usually stuter or talk fast. Everytime I'd stuter, I'd probe a question and everytime I'd talk fast, I'd quickly skim through some relevant material.What I'm meaning to say is after the first day of the teambuilding event, I realised, I could do this again without going through all the anxiety and nervousness. Strangely, the next day, I was so at ease and actually enjoyed leading the presentation for over 8 hrs! The weird thing though is when I get into my material, I could only stare at one person for a period of time (endless mins at times) - they were certain faces I'd selectively feel comfortable starring at as I presented which is weird because I know I made one of the guys uncomfortable, he actually thought I was about to have a dig at him.
Today, the Finance Director showed me the video and I was so shocked to see myself. I almost couldn't identify/relate to myself. Amazing huh? how we could just evolve/change into something else when we're not comfortable doing it. I think I'm over my Presentation Phobia now and strangely, I'm eager to do more presentations - of course so long as I know I could challenge the audience, teach them something new and keep energizing them through out the presentation which I did in the event. I wish I could post pictures but that just wouldn't be fair on them.
The first was when I had to lead the monthly performance forum and didn't know anything more than my slides. It didn't go as well as I would have hoped it to because I lacked historical data so I couldn't really compare, I could just be factual about the Now results.I was then asked to lead a teambuilding event for the Finance department. Of course, I didn't get any sleep due to high levels of anxiety and stressing about it going all wrong since I've never done something like this before. I'd keep changing the slides to the very last 5 mins before the beginning of the event. I even changed slides during the breaks.
My first day, I suffered from terrible anxiety but funny enough my nervousness was displayed as enthusiasm and excitement. I usually stuter or talk fast. Everytime I'd stuter, I'd probe a question and everytime I'd talk fast, I'd quickly skim through some relevant material.What I'm meaning to say is after the first day of the teambuilding event, I realised, I could do this again without going through all the anxiety and nervousness. Strangely, the next day, I was so at ease and actually enjoyed leading the presentation for over 8 hrs! The weird thing though is when I get into my material, I could only stare at one person for a period of time (endless mins at times) - they were certain faces I'd selectively feel comfortable starring at as I presented which is weird because I know I made one of the guys uncomfortable, he actually thought I was about to have a dig at him.
Today, the Finance Director showed me the video and I was so shocked to see myself. I almost couldn't identify/relate to myself. Amazing huh? how we could just evolve/change into something else when we're not comfortable doing it. I think I'm over my Presentation Phobia now and strangely, I'm eager to do more presentations - of course so long as I know I could challenge the audience, teach them something new and keep energizing them through out the presentation which I did in the event. I wish I could post pictures but that just wouldn't be fair on them.
posted by Color at 2:03 AM
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